Filth
by FluffyMustache
Summary: Chemicals aren't the only ways to clean messes.


Eh, hello? My name is Zelda. I'm a wolf...

When I first came to Balsa, I didn't really have any relatives that could help me to get back on my feet, then I met a nice squirrel named Scaredy.

He said I could stay for as long as I needed to, so I'm currently living with him.

It's been awhile since I had first arrived.

Having a little trouble finding somewhere I can stay. Hehehe.

Well, enough with the back stories, that's not what I'm here to talk about.

So... about today.

Okay, I'm not exactly complaining here, not at all, I've dreamed of it happening, but I hadn't thought it would ever actually happen.

All I was doing was playing outside in the mud. What was I supposed to do, clean it?

Well, yep. That's basically it. Just innocently playing in the mud.

But then I went inside, forgetting to clean myself, and here we are now.

...

Zelda climbed up the ladder leading to the house, did a small shake and trotted inside, unknowingly bringing in muddy tracks with her.

"Hey, Scaredy! You were wrong about playing in that mud, it was great!" Zelda shouted through the hallway, then flopped down on the couch, her actions making her look a bit like Dave.

She was spread out on the couch with her forepaws sticking off the side when Scaredy walked in.

Scaredy announced his presence with a loud gasp.

"Zelda, look at the mess you've made!" he shouted, whipping his head in circles, looking back and forth through the mess.

"The house is all muddy, and you're so-" Scaredy quickly stopped his ranting to look over Zelda, who's head was lowered to her paws and staring up at him with sad, puppy eyes.

Slowly, his angry frown turned into an almost evil smirk, confusing Zelda greatly.

"Filthy."

He flicked the word off his tongue, continuing his creepy smile.

Although she was confused, Zelda looked at the muddy floors and couch.

"Oh, shoot. Sorry, Scaredy, I'll go clean it up."

She looked back up at Scaredy only to find he wasn't in his previous spot, he was at the door.

Locking it.

"Now, now, Zelda. No need to be so rash. I can clean it. But, there will have to be punishment of course."

Punishment?

Zelda yelped when Scaredy seemed to teleport in front of her holding something.

The hose from the sink?

The hell was this squirrel planning?

"I'll give you a five second head start," he commanded, holding the miniature hose as if it were a loaded gun.

Zelda didn't move.

Was he being serious of just joking? He wouldn't let his precious home get more dirty than it already was, would he?

"One."

'Well, this outa be fun..'

"Two."

Zelda took off running on all four paws to the door, fumbling with the lock.

"THREE,FOUR,FIVE!" Scaredy screamed, blasting the water in different directions, as Zelda attempted to get away.

She jumped from place to place, forcing the mad squirrel to spray down the areas she would have been only seconds earlier.

"You crazy, man!" shrieked Zelda, who was yet to be hit.

"Can't have you running around dirty, now can I?" he said simply.

The chase continued until the distraction began.

Zelda was in mid jump when there was a pounding on the door.

Everything seemed to freeze, even the flying dog.

'Ugh, why do bad things happen to good... wolves?' Zelda thought as gravity had its fun, slamming her into the ground.

The knocks grew louder until the door burst open.

"Hey, Scaredy? Why's you're door all locked up? You knew I was coming over, and it's a dark and lonely world out there. On your porch."

She casually rested her head on a paw.

"What's up, Dave?" Zelda asked with a smile.

"Oh, hey Zelda," he waved. "What are y'all doing, having a water fight? In your house? Without _me_?"

_QUESTION MAN!_

She looked to Scaredy. Who was looking at her. Aiming the weapon at her chest.

'This is how I die...'

"Sorry, but I have to do this, Zelda," Scaredy stated before pulling the trigger.

Zelda slowly closed her eyes and fell to the ground, as she felt the liquid surround her fallen form.

'I can feel all life leaving my body.'

She opened her eyes weakly at Scaredy who had an annoyed look on his face.

"Scaredy, come closer," she wheezed.

He walked toward her dully.

"I have very severe wounds. I don't think I'm gonna make it," she whimpered, rolling to her side to face him.

"Tell my parents I love them," she said before going limp, tongue falling out of her mouth.

"OH NO, ZELDA DIED!" Dave screamed, running to her and holding her 'lifeless' body to his chest.

"Zelda, get up. We need to clean this mess."

Dave looked up with tears in his eyes. "WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO HER CORPSE?" he sobbed loudly.

"Dave, she's not dead," Scaredy informed him calmly.

Zelda's tongue swiped back into her mouth, "Yes I am."

"SEE, I TOLD YOU!"

Scaredy walked up to her.

"No, you're not."

She suddenly opened her eyes and said, "Then what's this blood doing on me?"

Scaredy dragged his hands down her stomach and showed her the clear water.

"It's not blood, smart one. It's water," he groaned, shaking his head playfully.

Zelda's eyes shot open and she looked down, with an idiot's smile on her face.

"Oh, well bonus, I guess. I'm alive and clean."


End file.
